Eager to please
Being the boss, the boy loves to hear me ask for sex. Confident in the knowledge that I always will, he’s content to sit back and wait to be jumped on, pleaded with, or asked politely. It’s a fun game for both of us – he revels in the luxury of having a girlfriend who actively seeks out sex, and I crave the submissiveness that comes from having to ask. But it wasn’t always this way.
One of the world’s best-kept secrets is that not all men want sex 24/7. They don’t want a woman who wants sex all the time – they want a woman who wants sex just as much as they do. Some men feel threatened by a woman with a higher drive than them, and I’ve been unlucky enough to be with a few of those kinds of men.
The result? I felt like shit, quite frankly. Though I knew it wasn’t me, it’s very hard not to feel rejected when you’re busting out your best sexy moves on a bloke and he just rolls over. It leads to resentment and a desperate lack of self-esteem.
This is not a problem I have anymore. I’m welcomed with open arms and wandering hands whenever the mood strikes me… but I’m still suffering the hangover of previous bad relationships.
I need him to want me. Having sex whenever I want it is not enough. (Spoiled, moi?) I’m happy to ask for it; to pout, bat my eyelids and seduce the pants off him – but sometimes I need to be taken. I want desire to overtake him and make him throw the rules out the window, and drag me up the stairs to bed.
Luckily for me, I’m not the only one who’s eager to please.
Filed under: musings | Leave a Comment