Dan Savage on the Price of Admission – those compromises you make in a relationship for the sake of staying in a relationship. Some really nice thoughts in here, but my favourite quote:
That’s the only way you become the one… because somebody is willing to pretend you are…
This video reminded me of an article I read in a glossy once. It was the token bloke’s perspective one they always throw in, and the topic was “How to turn a one-night stand into the one”. Advice for women on how to land a guy, as such articles always are. And it was heartwrenchingly depressing. Do this, don’t do that. Don’t talk too much to your friends, don’t flirt too much with his. Be adventurous in bed, but not slutty. Be domestic but not a bunny boiler, etc etc.
In essence, it was how to trick a man in wanting to be with you forever. At which point, presumably, we can give up the pretence and start being the crazy bitches all men know we secretly are, right? And all I could think was, “it’s not like that”. When you’re with ‘the One’ (though like Savage, I don’t believe in THE one, more like ‘the right one for me’) you’re not worried about what they’re doing wrong and if you want to be with them… you’re worried about what you’re doing wrong and if they want to be with you.
That might sound pathetically needy or insecure, but the clincher is… they’re doing the exact same thing. And that, my friends, is worth putting up with the mayonnaise on the counter, chewing with their mouth open, or a truly woeful memory (<3) for.
As prices of admission go, it’s a bargain.
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